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ravencallscrowsI am so incredibly pissed at the moment i'm sitting at my desk shaking with anger. I'm beyond killing my boss. He's not even worth the effort any more. I just need to focus on getting out of here on my terms.
Gods damn it, if you have a problem with something that i'm doing, mention it, and do so before review time, ok? Ever since i wrote my review, i've been getting these weekly 'You need to be doing more....' comments.
Today's complaint: you're not posting the results of your file checks to the team website. Response: The file checks are posted every build, in the same place they have all project. I just no longer send mail about it everytime unless there's a problem. No one ever looks at the reports i file anyway (i know this because after developing the suspicion that no one did, i ACL'd the folder they're in, and no one ever asked why they couldn't get to them anymore), and there's no useful information in them, unless there's a problem, and then there's mail everywhere about it.
You want the reports, they're in the same damn place they've always been. You want them posted to the website, ask me to do it, and i don't care where the fuck you want them posted, i'll make it happen. You want my automation results posted on the website? Ask me to do it. I'd be delighted to stop sending mail with the rollups and just post them, or do both. Don't make it sound like i'm not doing my fucking job because i'm not delivering something you never fucking asked for. I am not a goddamed mindreader. And knock off the passive-agressive shit already, will you? Either pat me on the back or cut my throat, but don't use patting me on the shoulder as a fulcrum to stab me between the shoulder blades.
If you ask what i need to be more effective or happier in my job, you better be in a position to attempt to deliver on the request. I'm not going to ask for stuff i don't need, but when i'm told in July that in spite of having around a hundred accrued vacation hours i can't take any time off until at least September, after being told I could have a few days in early June, only to have that changed at the last moment to only a single day. Rationale for not being able to take vacation? "We have beta upcoming, and it's important we have everyone's attention on getting that ready." Sounds plausible, but the only languages we're doing a beta in are English and Japanese; and my department has no responsibilities for either. Don't tell me that you question my committment to my job when i've been asking to transfer to another one for over a year now, but, because i'm a professional, i'll continue to do everything asked of me in as timely and efficient a manner as possible. For that matter, i've had an earache that's probably indicative of a sinus infection (and the rest of the concomitant sinus issues to go along with it) for the past three weeks, but have continued to come to work every day because we've been in the middle of a security push, which i've been told is absolute A-1, "do not miss this under any condition" priority, in spite of the fact that i'm not a feature tester, and have no idea how to use most of the tricky bells and whistles in Office, much less which ones are likely places which could be exploited.
When you ask for something, and i ask a question or make a comment about it, think about the comment or question. If you're asking for something that's not realistic, and i tell you why it's not plausible, don't listen, agree, and then send me e-mail listing a new deliverable of what i just told you can't be done for reasons a-z. Believe it or not, i don't talk to hear myself. Add to that that anytime you make a reasonable request, the response is "I'll make it happen," and it will.
I'm now convinced i'm getting screwed on my review. It doesn't make any difference to me, other than bonus money would have been nice to have for moving closer so that there's one less thing which stresses me out beyond belief- right now that list has two items on it: work and commuting.
Once it's official, i'll be resigning, i'm pretty sure (hey, i might get an amazing surprise, but i'm not counting on the miraculous). I'll see if one of the contract agencies can find me a new position, even though the benefits are nice to have, it's not worth the stress to continue to slave in a job i hate. It'll be a pretty particular list- i'd be reasonably content to do tech writing/editing or content writing nearly anywhere, i'll author web content. I'll even accept testing posts, but at present, i'd rather only look at ones in games groups. If push comes to shove, i'll accept other things, but this is a group which refuses to release me to another one where i'm a better fit because they need competent, experienced people, so i don't see being suddenly thrust in a position where they'd rather have no one doing my job rather than someone who's totally miserable at doing it, but will do anything requested of him.
Anyone want a slightly burnt-out, but otherwise competent employee? Experienced writer, support specialist, web designer, software tester; past experiences also include various graphics arts, journalism. Not qualified for use as domestic staff, other than as bed warmer or possibly pool-boy, but willing to exercise any/all creative abilities for the right opportunity. Doing windows- other than the computer type (including X-Windows) is right out.
Gods damn it, if you have a problem with something that i'm doing, mention it, and do so before review time, ok? Ever since i wrote my review, i've been getting these weekly 'You need to be doing more....' comments.
Today's complaint: you're not posting the results of your file checks to the team website. Response: The file checks are posted every build, in the same place they have all project. I just no longer send mail about it everytime unless there's a problem. No one ever looks at the reports i file anyway (i know this because after developing the suspicion that no one did, i ACL'd the folder they're in, and no one ever asked why they couldn't get to them anymore), and there's no useful information in them, unless there's a problem, and then there's mail everywhere about it.
You want the reports, they're in the same damn place they've always been. You want them posted to the website, ask me to do it, and i don't care where the fuck you want them posted, i'll make it happen. You want my automation results posted on the website? Ask me to do it. I'd be delighted to stop sending mail with the rollups and just post them, or do both. Don't make it sound like i'm not doing my fucking job because i'm not delivering something you never fucking asked for. I am not a goddamed mindreader. And knock off the passive-agressive shit already, will you? Either pat me on the back or cut my throat, but don't use patting me on the shoulder as a fulcrum to stab me between the shoulder blades.
If you ask what i need to be more effective or happier in my job, you better be in a position to attempt to deliver on the request. I'm not going to ask for stuff i don't need, but when i'm told in July that in spite of having around a hundred accrued vacation hours i can't take any time off until at least September, after being told I could have a few days in early June, only to have that changed at the last moment to only a single day. Rationale for not being able to take vacation? "We have beta upcoming, and it's important we have everyone's attention on getting that ready." Sounds plausible, but the only languages we're doing a beta in are English and Japanese; and my department has no responsibilities for either. Don't tell me that you question my committment to my job when i've been asking to transfer to another one for over a year now, but, because i'm a professional, i'll continue to do everything asked of me in as timely and efficient a manner as possible. For that matter, i've had an earache that's probably indicative of a sinus infection (and the rest of the concomitant sinus issues to go along with it) for the past three weeks, but have continued to come to work every day because we've been in the middle of a security push, which i've been told is absolute A-1, "do not miss this under any condition" priority, in spite of the fact that i'm not a feature tester, and have no idea how to use most of the tricky bells and whistles in Office, much less which ones are likely places which could be exploited.
When you ask for something, and i ask a question or make a comment about it, think about the comment or question. If you're asking for something that's not realistic, and i tell you why it's not plausible, don't listen, agree, and then send me e-mail listing a new deliverable of what i just told you can't be done for reasons a-z. Believe it or not, i don't talk to hear myself. Add to that that anytime you make a reasonable request, the response is "I'll make it happen," and it will.
I'm now convinced i'm getting screwed on my review. It doesn't make any difference to me, other than bonus money would have been nice to have for moving closer so that there's one less thing which stresses me out beyond belief- right now that list has two items on it: work and commuting.
Once it's official, i'll be resigning, i'm pretty sure (hey, i might get an amazing surprise, but i'm not counting on the miraculous). I'll see if one of the contract agencies can find me a new position, even though the benefits are nice to have, it's not worth the stress to continue to slave in a job i hate. It'll be a pretty particular list- i'd be reasonably content to do tech writing/editing or content writing nearly anywhere, i'll author web content. I'll even accept testing posts, but at present, i'd rather only look at ones in games groups. If push comes to shove, i'll accept other things, but this is a group which refuses to release me to another one where i'm a better fit because they need competent, experienced people, so i don't see being suddenly thrust in a position where they'd rather have no one doing my job rather than someone who's totally miserable at doing it, but will do anything requested of him.
Anyone want a slightly burnt-out, but otherwise competent employee? Experienced writer, support specialist, web designer, software tester; past experiences also include various graphics arts, journalism. Not qualified for use as domestic staff, other than as bed warmer or possibly pool-boy, but willing to exercise any/all creative abilities for the right opportunity. Doing windows- other than the computer type (including X-Windows) is right out.
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no subject
Date: 2002-07-05 04:04 pm (UTC)No money to start off right away, until your stuff starts selling, then you get profits minus any costs for selling the item (probably around 30% of the sale price, depending on the item)
Let me know if you have any ideas. :)