Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained.
Jul. 25th, 2002 01:41 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ravencallscrowsOh, well. This just confirms that it's time to concentrate on looking elsewhere for work.
From the e-mail i sent my HR person today:
My general feeling at this point is that since I have no written evidence to back up my positions, there probably aren't any actionable items. In our 1:1 today, we worked at trying to clear up most of the other communication issues, and I cc'd you on the notes from that report.
Really, the only substantial issue where we have an irreconcilable difference is regarding negative feedback. It really was a rude shock to go from feeling that I was meeting or exceeding all expectations to feeling that my performance was inadequate; but, since none of it is in writing, it would appear that the only option I really have is to accept whatever review I get and suffer through with an unsatisfactory review until next review period or until I resign as an FTE at Microsoft.
I feel better for having participated in the conflict resolution process, but the end results don't promise to be a significant improvement over what's simply an untenable position for me, simply because the stress and general dissatisfaction I have presently- the element I most needed to change- is unlikely to change.
-vanya
And the excerpts from the bits of straightening out the miscommunications alluded to above, sent to my boss and cc'd to HR [editorial comments inserted in rectangular brackets for clarity]:
Thanks for taking the time to work with me on fixing some of our miscommunication issues. I did not realize that you didn't understand that my complete lack of competence with any of the CS languages has been the biggest contributing factor to why I've felt like such a bad fit in this department, and that it's why I've tried to express an interest as frequently as possible at investigating the possibilities in another department. Simply being unable to read any of the UI and context menus in any of our products is amazingly frustrating [i can phonetically read bits of the Hebrew, which we're not building presently, but as far as having a concrete understanding of what everything means, it's just slightly less incomprehensible than any of the others. At least in Hebrew i never get the Yes and No buttons confused. :-)]. I know when this department shifted from reporting to Renee [the boss we had after our old boss became a PM, but before my current boss had anyone directly reporting to him], Nader [the test manager who is my boss' boss] had a meeting with us all individually, and at that time he specifically stated that each of us were expected to remain with the project through RTM. Mentioning this to you afterwards, I understood you to say that the vision was for us all to be committed to staying through release. If I'd understood this as anything other than being explicitly denied permission to interview with other groups, I'd have certainly started doing so as soon as I was eligible to do so rather than continuing to subject myself to what has been an escalating cycle of frustration for me.
I understand now that I have explicit permission to take any online classes offered through MSTE, time permitting as this can be worked into my schedule around other obligations (during installations etc.). Previous statements indicating that it was not a good time to do so were not intended as a blanket refusal of permission to do so to improve my skill set.
I wish you'd clearly indicated that you weren't happy with my performance before mid to late June. Until that point my honest perception was that I was meeting all of the expectations that had been set for me, even though I'm was not completely satisfied with the results I had to show for my work. Regardless of appearances on the basis of raw statistics, I'm working as hard at meeting all expectations as I did before Office XP RTM and ever since. Honestly, your implication in the last few weeks that this wasn't the case I took as a direct challenge to my personal honour and professionalism, although I don't think you intended it as such. [Actually, this couldn't be farther from the truth, but in the interest of self-preservation, i'm not about to kick over that wasp's nest. I think that's exactly what he intended to do, and it was the proverbial straw which broke this camel's back and made me decide that it was worth taking to HR.]
Since converting to FTE status last April, I've taken a total of three vacation days- two wrapped around a holiday weekend, and the third when my friends were in town on their honeymoon in June. I've presently got over a hundred accrued vacation hours, and two personal days. If there's any way I can take some of those in the upcoming month or two, it'd be greatly appreciated, just to let me attempt to distance myself from my frustrations and regain a fresh focus. If possible, I'd like to take the 21st and 22nd off- there's a late event on the evening of the 21st I'd like to attend and not worry about getting home in time to be up again for work the next morning; and to squeeze in a week of vacation before the end of the summer. With beta now six weeks later, perhaps this will be possible?
vanya y. tucherov
(Ваня Е. Тючеров)
Software Test Engineer
International Office Shared Services Testing
Office.Net
16/3205 x76405
Anyone want a jaded, cynical, sarcastic, cantankerous, yet lovable and occasionally funny male with skills as a software tester, writer of at best minor merit, and diverse collector of semi-random trivia? I don't eat much.
From the e-mail i sent my HR person today:
My general feeling at this point is that since I have no written evidence to back up my positions, there probably aren't any actionable items. In our 1:1 today, we worked at trying to clear up most of the other communication issues, and I cc'd you on the notes from that report.
Really, the only substantial issue where we have an irreconcilable difference is regarding negative feedback. It really was a rude shock to go from feeling that I was meeting or exceeding all expectations to feeling that my performance was inadequate; but, since none of it is in writing, it would appear that the only option I really have is to accept whatever review I get and suffer through with an unsatisfactory review until next review period or until I resign as an FTE at Microsoft.
I feel better for having participated in the conflict resolution process, but the end results don't promise to be a significant improvement over what's simply an untenable position for me, simply because the stress and general dissatisfaction I have presently- the element I most needed to change- is unlikely to change.
-vanya
And the excerpts from the bits of straightening out the miscommunications alluded to above, sent to my boss and cc'd to HR [editorial comments inserted in rectangular brackets for clarity]:
Thanks for taking the time to work with me on fixing some of our miscommunication issues. I did not realize that you didn't understand that my complete lack of competence with any of the CS languages has been the biggest contributing factor to why I've felt like such a bad fit in this department, and that it's why I've tried to express an interest as frequently as possible at investigating the possibilities in another department. Simply being unable to read any of the UI and context menus in any of our products is amazingly frustrating [i can phonetically read bits of the Hebrew, which we're not building presently, but as far as having a concrete understanding of what everything means, it's just slightly less incomprehensible than any of the others. At least in Hebrew i never get the Yes and No buttons confused. :-)]. I know when this department shifted from reporting to Renee [the boss we had after our old boss became a PM, but before my current boss had anyone directly reporting to him], Nader [the test manager who is my boss' boss] had a meeting with us all individually, and at that time he specifically stated that each of us were expected to remain with the project through RTM. Mentioning this to you afterwards, I understood you to say that the vision was for us all to be committed to staying through release. If I'd understood this as anything other than being explicitly denied permission to interview with other groups, I'd have certainly started doing so as soon as I was eligible to do so rather than continuing to subject myself to what has been an escalating cycle of frustration for me.
I understand now that I have explicit permission to take any online classes offered through MSTE, time permitting as this can be worked into my schedule around other obligations (during installations etc.). Previous statements indicating that it was not a good time to do so were not intended as a blanket refusal of permission to do so to improve my skill set.
I wish you'd clearly indicated that you weren't happy with my performance before mid to late June. Until that point my honest perception was that I was meeting all of the expectations that had been set for me, even though I'm was not completely satisfied with the results I had to show for my work. Regardless of appearances on the basis of raw statistics, I'm working as hard at meeting all expectations as I did before Office XP RTM and ever since. Honestly, your implication in the last few weeks that this wasn't the case I took as a direct challenge to my personal honour and professionalism, although I don't think you intended it as such. [Actually, this couldn't be farther from the truth, but in the interest of self-preservation, i'm not about to kick over that wasp's nest. I think that's exactly what he intended to do, and it was the proverbial straw which broke this camel's back and made me decide that it was worth taking to HR.]
Since converting to FTE status last April, I've taken a total of three vacation days- two wrapped around a holiday weekend, and the third when my friends were in town on their honeymoon in June. I've presently got over a hundred accrued vacation hours, and two personal days. If there's any way I can take some of those in the upcoming month or two, it'd be greatly appreciated, just to let me attempt to distance myself from my frustrations and regain a fresh focus. If possible, I'd like to take the 21st and 22nd off- there's a late event on the evening of the 21st I'd like to attend and not worry about getting home in time to be up again for work the next morning; and to squeeze in a week of vacation before the end of the summer. With beta now six weeks later, perhaps this will be possible?
vanya y. tucherov
(Ваня Е. Тючеров)
Software Test Engineer
International Office Shared Services Testing
Office.Net
16/3205 x76405
Anyone want a jaded, cynical, sarcastic, cantankerous, yet lovable and occasionally funny male with skills as a software tester, writer of at best minor merit, and diverse collector of semi-random trivia? I don't eat much.
